Explore Song Messages

A song came on. A simple song. No real complex strings, no real complex melodies. Simple. But it struck me with so much awe that I had to pause. Pause everything for a moment. And listen. I cried as I listened. Real hot tears. Tears that haven’t seen the light of day in days. Tears that have been held up. All the real frustration underneath, melting away like ice cubes on a hot summer day. I write to you what I feel, beyond the ice, beyond the daily lack of direction. I show up, I show emotions, that’s true, but sometimes I let things linger unnoticed underneath for far too long. I feel like I’ve been wasting away these past few days, the past two weeks that I’ve been back. You stick with me even though my circumstances aren’t that great and currently aren’t looking too optimistic. I’ll be honest and say that being stuck at home daily, especially with all these distractions in front of me, isn’t entirely helping. The guilt of not being able to do anything, feeling useless, still lingers in the back of my mind. I preach about it, yet I do nothing to change it. But, still, I get a break from it all. Though undeserving as it feels, I get that break with you. I get to truly put everything on pause, hold my breath for a moment, and relax. The comfort that you bring me is undeniable. The love you show me, beyond our shared lust, is ever so present. Though our distance apart may be short, both in terms of travel time and days, it’s still… lonely without you by my side daily. I honestly don’t know how I could miss someone as much as I miss you. I’ve never really truly felt at home with anyone as much as I have you. You mean the world to me, and I want to do better. I want to be the best version of myself that I can be for you. Despite every wrong step and I’ve been doing that a lot lately. It feels like I’m apologizing for some wrongdoing, haha. But at this point, I’m just trying to forgive myself for feeling like I’m failing at everything I try to do. I don’t know when things will start going right for me, but I sure hope it’s coming soon. The only thing that I can cling to right now is you. My solid foundation in the crumbling mess I have around me. I thank you for that, my dear Fae. When things end up positively again, I want you there beside me. So we can tackle this shitty world together. But hey, despite all that’s going on right now, at least we’ll share the same moon. I love you, Fae, Yours truly, Martin.

Password protected content

happiest 20th, ravi. i'm still disappointed with the fact that me and you will never be forever. i wished you would try a bit more harder back then. rokoknya jangan banyak2 ya? be happy ya vi...im wishing you all the best, titip salam untuk mama, ayah, dan kayla☺️

This might sound cliche. But, I think this is the end of our heartfelft story. It was a lovely expedition to be with you from 7th to 9th grade. It was truly a blessing in disguise to meet you. This memories will stay and the nostalgia of being hated will come back — I just know. As my favorite artist said “Paalam, kaibigan ko” Or shoul I say, “Paalam, ka-ibigan ko?”

ChatGPT said: "Even though we’re classmates, we’ve never really talked, yet I still can’t deny that I have deep feelings for you. It’s strange how someone I barely speak to can still take up so much space in my heart. But I know you like another girl, and as much as I wish I could be the one you notice, I can’t change the way you feel. So I just keep these emotions to myself, quietly hoping for a moment that may never come."

i loved you :)

i loved you :)

-

To my dear Ben, i wouldn’t send this to you because you have a girlfriend now and i really can’t just stop thinking about you and i really really want to hug you right now but I can’t I am such a fool for ignoring you for a month and now…. Your gone by my side and your on anither girls side which is not me.. I miss calling you baby,love and more nicknames I call you I want to chat you how I feel right now but I can’t because you have a new girlfriend i really really miss you, I miss you in every universe,I love you in every universe.. but you love K in every universe,timeline. My heart still has a space for you but I guess for you it doesn’t have space for mine, I know we are exes but I still miss you, I can’t move on and whenever the other teachers in school mentions you I suddenly can’t stop thinking about you, being your girlfriend was the best thing that happened in your life, I really thought we would last a lifetime and we would get married but we wouldn’t and that really happens in life, my friends and my classmates cheer me up and said that I should move on from you. I keep saying yes but I can’t move on from you, I still remember the way you used to love me. I still have the letters I wasn’t able to give you when you were still in Dulong Bayan campus, everyone knows im still waiting for you and that I wouldn’t listen to them that I wouldn’t move on, I guess your happy,super happy with k now I’ll support you for that I keep on writing more letters for you but can’t show it to anyone I keep it in one small box full of letters for you and… I would wait for you in another lifetime,universe ben. Even if im old enough I would wait for you I still miss you i still love you i still care for you but we’re just friends now right? Friends.

The part of song in my head is ‘I’m in Love for the first time ‘ 🎶

The line of the song that’s playing in my head is…I’m in love for the first time…🎶🎼🎵

youve changed, a lot.. not in the way i like but i hope it makes you happier

miss u

I love you so much, more than that for my boyfriend, because if it wasn't for her, I wouldn't have felt love like this.

Password protected content

hi baby ,im sorry for letting you down again, i know this isn’t the first time, and that makes it even harder for you to believe in me right now, i understand how much it must hurt, and i hate that i caused that pain. im also disappointed in myself, i keep thinking about how i could have done better, and it breaks my heart knowing i didn’t, it’s not because i don’t care, you mean so much to me, and i never want you to feel unloved or unimportant. im not going to make promises i might fail to keep, all i can do now is show you, step by step, that im willing to put in the effort to make things right, i hope, with time, you can see that in me again. i love you more than i can say mina 💕

Hii i know its been awhile but just as i promised i will admire you from afar i hope your doing fine right now youve literally made me crazy about you i will never forget the day we start talking and stop half of me that day to died because you were so special to me that even my family see how i change so much i hope in other universe or i hope someday we can see eachother but with the best version and maturity to handle a rl . Good luck to your journey!

Hahap